Peri  (lost track of the date!)

 

I’m all a dither.  One minute we’re chilling on our moving house then we go scooting across some water to see our friends Debbie and Stephen for a sleep over.  We were on best behaviour but Thornton still managed to drop lots of fluff everywhere.  Our favourite owner was equipped with a brush and pan and followed us around.  Stephen now loves us.  OK, he won’t admit it but I understand these reluctant humans.  They don’t want to lose face by admitting that we can be cute and cuddly and an asset to anyone, anywhere. Debbie was a push over from the start and seems to favour Thornton but I don’t care because I know I’ve got so much more to offer.

We’re now in a new home on land.  I’m not sure what’s going on but we go outside on those lead things and have time to check out the wildlife.  There are lots of little things running about on the ground and I’ve tried to catch them but they’re too quick.  Or I’m getting too old.  I’ve managed to open a cupboard in the kitchen with my paw and nose and it freaks the owners out incase I can do the same to the fridge.

Every time they go out and leave us on our own she says “No wild parties while we’re out boys.”  I’m seriously worried about her.  Do they really think we’re going to just sit here and behave?  Dumb humans.

 

Peri 5/3

We’ve been moving around a lot recently and seen some interesting places.  There was one where we were attached to land and we got lots of comments from people walking past so Thornton and I smiled nicely for them.  The food has changed a few times as well.  My favourite owner tried serving up something disgusting once but when she put it down in front of us we just looked at it and walked off, AND we were really hungry.  Sometimes you have to put your paw down.  Then they ate ham in front of us.  Thornton got some scraps because his eye’s still closed a bit but I think he’s just putting it on now.  I lay on the sofa trying to look cute and very weak and eventually she gave me a bit of ham as well.  They brought some fish home this week and made a big fuss of chopping it up for us, telling us how nice it was but Thornton and I don’t like Chinese food, it’s far too spicy.  We’ve been with them all our lives and they still don’t know that by now?  I despair.

Where we are now is so windy that when I look over the side upstairs my ears get pinned back and my whiskers go all flat.  It’s quite refreshing but favourite owner panics and worries about me.  I like to keep her keen.

 

North by North West

Quite a lot has happened in the last few weeks.

We left the boat park in Grenada and the noisy thing in the kitchen has rumbled a few times as we have been going North. I know it is North because there is a pointer near the steering wheel that I look at occasionally, the boat boss owner never seems to take any notice of it as he seems to spend his time playing video games on a screen near it. Some times the noisy thing is turned off and we still seem to be going north quite quickly. Along the way we have met some of our old friends, a man who makes covers for things and his children who are very good looking, the nice vet inspection lady in Blue Lagoon who knows us so well she didn't even bother to ruffle our fur. We have seen a lot of Stephen and Debbie and the berk Peri thinks he has converted Stephen to a cat lover. He is deluding himself, come to think of it he is deluded most of the time! 

After the first week I started to feel a bit unwell and went off my food. I have been having a nagging tooth ache and one day I ate a hard biscuit and it got stuck on my bad tooth. I shrieked and ran crazy to the back bedroom. Our favourite owner spotted my angst and gave me cuddles. Over the next couple of weeks she kept looking at me and said I was getting thin. Flipping cheek, that implied I was fat before. I know our owners are always on some sort of diet but please, have I ever needed to diet? Well eventually I found it hard to eat anything and I took to curling up and sleeping for most of the day. I know I do a lot of that anyway but this was extreme. When we arrived at the boat park in Rodney Bay the big owner agreed I needed to see an animal doctor. When we arrived I recognised him as a very sweet man called Dr Scotland. I remember nothing after that and woke up at home with my favourite owner wiping blood from my face. The animal doctor must have slipped me a few vodka martinis as I couldn't walk in a straight line. I know they were vodka martinis as I have seen Debbie walk the same way many times. I noticed Peri getting jealous when I smiled and swotting me. I checked in the mirror and the animal doctor has given me a Hollywood smile. Peri says it must be ultrasound! He reads too many trash celebrity gossip magazines. The upshot is I am as handsome as ever and can eat anything and  the owners say I am ready for a trip to Martinique in France which is chique. The boss boat owner needs to look at the thing near the steering wheel more often as I hate to tell him France is 3000 miles due east!

 

Peri 13/2

Thornton hasn’t been too well lately so I’ve been going easy on him.  The last V.E.T. that he was bundled off to spoke very strangely and Thornton couldn’t understand a word that he was saying.  Then the owners also started to jabber on strangely, nodding and waving their hands about.  Poor Thornton had to have that thing stuck up his bottom again while he was there.  I don’t get what that’s about.  When he got back to the boat he told me all about his little boat ride and what the town was like.  The owners then had to put drops of liquid in his bad eye everyday.  It’s still closed but I have seen him open it if something gives him a fright.  Just to add to his woes he got a cold and kept sneezing all the time.  They started to call him ‘Snuffles’ and gave him even more attention.  He’s gone very thin so I let him have best pickings at meal time.  The other night the owners came back with a whole stash of meat for us, leftovers from a barbecue, and we both loved tucking in to it and then slept very well.  

On the whole I’ve been looking out for him and have been very nice so I hope he remembers that when he gets his strength back.

Peri 28/12

It’s been a very busy few weeks since the owners got back and we’ve done a lot of moving about.  It’s so exciting to get upstairs and see a new view.  A few days ago we went to visit the owners’ friends in their moving house.  Thornton went all gooey because he likes Debbie but I prefer to work on Stephen as he’s not overly in love with us, yet!  I egged Thornton to go and lie on their posh bed and he stretched out on Stephen’s side.  The owners thought it was hilarious and took pictures.  It was Debbie’s birthday and we were special guests so Stephen had to put up with us.  To be fair I think he does actually like us now but just doesn’t want to admit it.  We usually win people over.  They had a lot more places to play hide and seek in and I found a laundry basket to sit in.

  

At the moment we’re in a little bit of water surrounded by hills and there are some smart buildings on the land.  There are some little boat things that go and pick people up from their houses on the water and take them to a place where I can see them eating.  

 

The owner has been worried about Thornton as he’s coughing and looking a bit thin these days, he hasn’t been eating much.  My favourite owner tried him on that fat chicken meat that they have at this time of year.  He ate a bit of that but when she opened a tin of tuna he went crazy.  I think he’s just getting old and fussy.  He’s enjoying lying up in the sun and being brushed a lot.